I feel great
I just peed on a car
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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