please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
she smelled like a LAN party
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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