I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
