I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
