ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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