I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize