That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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