i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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