I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
