WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
