maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
