From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
