His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize