I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
