I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
