you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
