distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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