hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
so let's talk penis.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
