you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
