We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
