she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
