week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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