If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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