I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
