What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
