I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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