he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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