i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
