discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
