That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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