they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize