what day is it and did you see me today?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
