I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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