i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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