I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I will pee on everything he values.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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