He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Randomize
