Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
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