If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
