I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize