Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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