Is it normal to miss your booty call?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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