I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
