Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
you never un-have a 4some
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
