he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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