Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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