That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
