Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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