love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Your cock deserves a montage
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
