Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
How does it feel to date your dad?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
