Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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